Bethany Joy Lenz Had a Strained Relationship with Sophia Bush on One Tree Hill

Bethany Joy Lenz wasn’t necessarily close to Sophia Bush when the two starred on One Tree Hill together.

In her new memoir Dinner For Vampires: Life on a Cult Show (While Also in an Actual Cult!), Lenz, 43, says that when they first met, they got along great.

“Sophia herself was also hilarious and a bit mischievous, always down for an impulsive adventure,” Lenz writes, talking about how they went to get pit bull puppies together not long after they met. But the friendship didn’t last.

“I soon realized I wasn’t equipped to get too close to Sophia,” Lenz says.

“As bubbly and compassionate as she was, she was even more intelligent … Her mind could have been put to good use by NASA — except, of course, she’s so beautiful the astronauts would never want to leave Earth,” Lenz writes.

The actress goes on to explain that she actually felt slightly inadequate around Bush.

“I failed to notice that she was also trying hard,” Lenz says. “Frequently favored and constantly underestimated in life because of her beauty, Sophia worked obsessively at proving her value.”

Lenz, who was deeply entrenched in a what she calls a Christian “cult” at the time, says this clashed with how she believed one should prove their value.

“I was using religion as my benchmark,” Lenz says. “My budding friendship with sweet Sophia became a casualty of this, and instead of sitting shiva for my ego, I really f—ing wish I could turn back time, walk into her trailer, and give her a long, hard hug.”

In the memoir, Lenz says that she and Hilarie Burton were close during filming, sharing a love of vintage shopping and crafting, but she recently admitted that they, too, had had a falling out, despite Lenz being a part of Burton and Bush’s One Tree Hill podcast Drama Queens.

During an appearance on the Call Her Daddy podcast on Wednesday, Oct. 16, Lenz opened up about the dynamic.

“I love Hilarie, I have always and will always, and I don’t have any problem with her,” she told host Alex Cooper. “There have been some bizarre misunderstandings that I really hope we can figure out one day, but I love that girl.”

In an interview with PEOPLE about life now, Lenz said she’s still incredibly close with several of her One Tree Hill castmates.

“I was just in Wilmington for the 21st-anniversary convention and got to hang out with Tyler Hilton andPaul Johansson and James Lafferty, and Robbie Buckley and Cullen Moss and Colin Fickes and Lee Norris. Everybody was there, including Antwon Tanner. It was mostly me and the boys, and Barbara Alyn Woods was there and Moira Kelly,” she said.

“And so we all just got to sit down and emotionally snuggle,” she continued. “We have all these moments in between all the events where we catch up on what we’re doing, and then we’ll have a dinner afterward or something, and it feels really good.”